Mary of Bethany’s story makes me think about how much my relationship with God has changed.

For a long time, I knew where to find God when I needed Him.

When something was falling apart.

When I needed an answer.

When I was scared.

When life became too heavy.

I knew how to pray desperate prayers.

But lately, I’m learning what it means to want God when nothing is wrong too.

That’s what I love about Mary.

We see her at Jesus’ feet three different times, and every time she’s carrying something different.

The first time, she’s simply listening.

She’s not asking Him to fix anything.

She’s not in crisis.

She just wants to be near Him and hear what He has to say.

Then life changes.

Her brother dies.

And Mary goes right back to the same place.

Except this time, she isn’t quietly listening.

She’s crying.

She’s grieving.

She’s telling Jesus exactly how she feels.

And He lets her.

He doesn’t rush her through it.

He doesn’t tell her she should have more faith.

He cries with her.

Then we see Mary at His feet again.

This time, she isn’t bringing a question or heartbreak.

She’s bringing worship.

She takes something incredibly valuable and pours it out on Jesus.

Three completely different versions of Mary.

And all three knew where to go.

That feels personal to me because I’ve spent a lot of my life going to God in survival mode.

But I’m not living in the same place anymore.

Now I’m learning how to sit with Him when there isn’t an emergency.

How to open my Bible because I genuinely want to know Him.

How to talk to Him throughout an ordinary day.

How to worship Him for who He is instead of only thanking Him for what He just brought me through.

And I still know where to go when life hurts.

I still know where to take the questions.

I still know where to cry.

But I don’t want Jesus to only be the place I run when everything falls apart.

I want His presence to be familiar.

Mary reminds me that I don’t need a different Jesus for every version of my life.

When I’m learning, I can sit with Him.

When I’m hurting, I can cry with Him.

When I’m grateful, I can worship Him.

When I have something precious, I can surrender it to Him.

Different seasons.

Same place.

At His feet.

And I think that’s the kind of relationship with Jesus I’m learning to have.

Not just knowing where to find Him when I need Him.

But knowing that’s where I want to be.